Porn Title Archive #3

PORN TITLES - April thru August 2010

On Her Majesty (Aug 29)
Tomorrow, Beaver Pies (Aug 22)
Cum Gusher, With Love (Aug 15)
The Man with the Emboldened Nun (Aug 8)
Cock-to-Pussy (Aug 1)
Ass Emo Royale (July 25)
The Giving Gay Tights (July 18)
Live in Wet Pie (July 11)
Die, Elizabethan Style, Another Day (July 4)
The Girl is not Enough (June 27)
A Ewe for a Fill (June 20)
Condom of Solace (June 13)
BrownEye (June 6)
Pearl Necklaces Are Cheaper (May 30)
You Only Jizz Twice (May 23)
Moonraider (May 16)
Underballs (May 9)
License to Thrill (May 2)
For Your Thighs Only (April 25)
Dr. Yes (April 18)
Boldfinger (April 11)

* there were no Porn Titles for the January-March 2010 period

Shelf of Shame #11

SECRET SAUCE... WHAT ??

Blake, Mary. Teen Time Cooking (with Carnation). 1959: Carnation Company: Toronto. Small 8vo. booklet, w. Illus. card covers. 16pp. Colour illus. throughout.

Bow-chicka-bow-wow.

I mean, I'd really like to believe they're going to cook, in a kitchen, with food. However, the cover illustration seriously calls that intent into question.


Particularly suspect in this context are recipes like "South of the Border Noodles and Beef" or "Five Minute Fudge for the Girls". The author proclaims: "You can learn to take pride and satisfaction in your cooking. Fun and memories are built around food." This booklet may well foster your culinary prowess... or awaken a deep-seeded affinity for sploshing.


FOR FURTHER RESEARCH:
Notes on Evaporated Milk
Everything you ever wanted to know about Sploshing... but were afriad to ask.

Shelf of Shame #10

THERE'S THE TRUE POPE, AND THEN THERE'S THE MAGNETIC POPE...

Marchessault, Guy. The Magnetic Pope. 1983, Novalis, Ottawa. Paperback, 160 pp. 16 pp. colour photos hors-texte in middle.


Just make sure you set your moral compass to the right one...


For Further Research:
List of Popes (I particularly like #46, St. Hilarius - the only funny one ever elevated: "Okay, you guys have been great - remember: I'm here all Easter, try the Host!"
Geomagnetism (not nearly as funny as the Popes)

Shelf of Shame #9

DECAPOD? MORE LIKE DECA-PERV...

Everything you always wanted to know about the Lobster: the Atlantic Ocean's most KINKY Character. Arthur Stuart Gillis. Magnetic Hill Inn: Moncton: 1976. Small booklet, stapled, glossy card covers. Unpaginated (8pp.)




Nature's nipple-clamps, I presume ??


For Further Research:
Lobsterman's Page

Ephemera of Shame #3

RELIGIOUS FOLK AIN'T RACIST...

Lecture Ticket, June 7 [1904]. Black print on grey card stock, 2.25" x 3.5". Kew Beach Presbyterian Church. In Aid of Church Building Fund. Price: 15c.

While not as egregious as some of the material I find, the simple matter-of-factness of its use of a derivative term, combined with its religious angle, make it a valuable and interesting addition to the collection.

At first, I believed the card to be from the W.W. II era - but such is not the case. I found a newspaper reference to the Rev. D.C. Hossack dated 1899, and it seemed unlikely he would still have been active (or even alive) by the 1940s. So my choices were reduced to W.W. I, or the Russo-Japanese War of 1904-05.

The latter seemed most likely, and has proven to be the case. There was a Presbyterian Church in the Kew Beach area of Toronto in this time period, and checking a universal calendar reveals that 1904 does indeed contain a Tuesday, June 7.

So this interesting little piece of Toronto ephemera is over a century old, and quite possibly the only one of its kind in existence - saved from oblivion by its use as a bookmark in a dusty tome whose reader has long since passed.

For Further Research:
Daily Empire & Mail, 1899
Kew Beach Presbyterian
Russo-Japanese War